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“closure”

Saturday Sep 29, 2012

I spent last night in my Grandma’s house. I was alone and she passed away 4 months ago.

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I’ve been avoiding going down to Goulburn since the funeral. I love my grandma and miss her terribly. Grams and her home have been such a constant for Sabine and I in a sometimes turbulent childhood, and the idea of being in her home, surrounded by her things, smelling of her but without her in it was just too much.

But the last couple of weeks I’ve begun to accept the fact that she’s gone, and just feel really grateful that I got to have her in my life. Because man, she was a cool lady. She’s funny as fuck, and smart and cheeky and was sharp, gave great hugs and I genuinely liked her.

The family owns the house next door to Grandma’s house which Dad lives in, so when I went down this weekend I’d thought I’d stay at Grandma’s and it was such a comfort. It was warm and peaceful and wonderful to be there. I slept like a baby, I hung out in her backyard and read a book, I sat in her chair and I feel good.

I still miss her desperately but it was a nice way to say my own goodbye to her.


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