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Tuesday Oct 26, 2010

I wear a shower cap whenever I have a shower and I’m not washing my hair. I may look like a knob but seriously curly hair and steam is a bitch.

My mother was a complete hippie when Sabine and I were younger. She made all of our own clothes, she was a vegetarian who wouldn’t walk past a butcher, she baked, she grew a lot of our own food. She gave this up when we were about 6 or 7 but still, it was nice while it lasted.

I get really really anxious when I have to go out to places on my own. I’ve got a 30th birthday party this weekend that is almost making me nauseous as I’ve got to go on my own and a bunch of people I don’t particularly like (school people) will be there. Turns out part of my anti-social personality is just bog standard anxiety.

I used to be a disgustingly active kid. I used to run all the bloody time and had calluses on my hands from all the time I spent on the monkey bars. I see my active childhood as making up for my slothful later years.

I would like to have a ton of children but I think I’d also be okay to just be an aunt too.

I turn 30 next year and I’m probably the most content I’ve been in a long time.

I always sleep on my stomach and apparently I snore. Sabine taped me snoring one night. I read her diary a lot as payback.

I adore my friends. Absolutely love the shit out of my core group of friends. Could do without some of the acquaintances but I have the friends I always wanted.

I want a farm so badly I can’t even put it into words.

I’m closer to my Dad, Sabine is closer to our Mum. Sabine and I had the ‘who gets which parent’ conversation a couple of years ago. She gets Mum, I get Dad. I think I got the better deal because our mother? She’s an almost perfect mix of Eddie and Patsy from Absolutely Fabulous. Which makes me Saffy I suppose.

I wanted to be a PE teacher and the first female prime minister when I was 5. Fucking Gillard beat me to it.

At Beth’s wedding there’s going to be a former state premier there and I know I’m going to end up having shots with him at the bar at 3 a.m.

I love cats but I really want a chocolate labrador. I’d call him/her Cocoa.

As a child of divorce I learnt two things: how to pack really well (lots of back and forth) and that I need stability far more than usual.

I keep on naming my pets names that I really should’ve kept for children’s names. Can’t really call a daughter Poppy anymore can I? Beth seems to think I can but if I found out my parents had named me after a dog I’d be pretty pissed.

I’ve never blocked anyone on Facebook, because let’s face it I deny as many friend requests as I approve so I have less people as my friends than normal. As a result I get quite upset if I’m blocked. It’s happened once and I still want to punch the person in the balls.

When I quit smoking last time I once followed a stranger smoking 2 blocks out of my way because the scent was intoxicating. It’s been too long since my make out session that I’m starting to get the same feeling when I walk past a delicious smelling man.

I think if John Lennon had lived he’d been a crotchety irrelevant old man. A male version of Germaine Greer that we’d all groan at when he took another jab at McCartney in the media.

I feel like the biggest cunt in the world when I walk past someone begging and I don’t give them any money.

Learning how to drive this year was one of the coolest things I’ve ever done. Considering I once stalled an automatic car this is progress.

I’m okay with watching porn but I get oddly icked out watching non-physical intimate moments in movies. I find it confronting. And no, I don’t get it either.

I think people who are constantly late are the rudest pricks in the world.

I think my grandma is one of the most awesome chicks I know. As long as you don’t mention the war.

I judge people constantly, it’s what keeps my entertained.

I think people who travel and load their literally hundreds of photos of their travels on Facebook are dicks. I feel they travel moreso for the photos and being able to start conversations with, “one time in Amsterdam…” than for the experience.

I can’t stand Vegemite. It’s yeast spread for gods sake. Yeast spread!

I despair when I hear of people my age who think the withdrawal method is an effective contraceptive. *waves* withdrawal method baby right here.

My aunt recently passed away. She was pretty estranged from the family and man are we finding out some interesting stuff. I’ve got 3 more cousins than I knew about! 3! And 2 of them are in jail! Jailbirds in the family! At least we’ll have stuff to talk about this Christmas.


I am showercap-less at the moment. I realise it’s an easy thing to fix, but I always forget to buy one and then I shower without one. It’s dicks, I love shower caps.

I also so agree with the travel thing. Traveling is about the experience and seeing the world, not so you can check off places on “Places I’ve been” on the Facebook Application. Also, I don’t care to see 400 pics of you in front of the same landmarks that 7 other people on my friends list have pictures of also. I just proves you can read a Lonely Planet guide and take a picture, nice work 🙂

I love you, Lucy, long time, but Vegemite is awesome. Yeast spread aside, it’s salty and delicious!!

October 26th, 2010 | 9:38 pm

I am loving the get to know Lucy blogging. Awesome. You should have someone interview you.

There is a precedent in my family for naming the kid after the pet thing – both kid and (renamed) cat are still alive. Kid is not yet old enough to know he got the cat’s name. It’s pretty cute in some ways.

October 27th, 2010 | 9:38 pm

My eldest daughter shares her middle name with husband’s late dog. Dog and child co-existed in same house for 6 years. Middle daughter shares her middle name with my late cat. Said cat had the good grace to pop her clogs just after middle daughter was born.

I am a chronic spoiler of sappy moments in films, am constantly obliged to make some cynical comment to distract people from my sqirming discomfort. Can’t remember the last time I watched porn in ‘company’ (husband doesn’t count) so don’t know how I’d fare there.

And with all due condolences and respect for your late Aunt, the things I’ve discovered about my immediate family in the last 5 weeks would make your toes curl. Jerry Springer would positively drool. And here was me thinking we were pillar of the community, respectable upstanding folk. Seems not.

Also, you would totally hate me. I used to think 5 minutes after agreed time was on time, but I’m reforming. Honest.

October 27th, 2010 | 9:58 pm

I love these kind of posts 🙂 And I love you! I wish you lived closer, you’re one awesome, awesome bitch. You must come visit me!!!

Oh! And my automatic stalls all the time, it’s more about the cold engine than the driver 😉

October 28th, 2010 | 8:29 am

Just caught up with your blog after a long lay off. I love it so readable now and I can hear your voice coming through. Not that I know your actual voice, but it sounds alive full of spirit. So thanks for the changed direction. Keep it up.
Yum x

November 4th, 2010 | 10:07 am
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