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sucked in bro

Monday Nov 24, 2008

I’ve lived in my apartment now for 4.5 years. I love it, it’s in a massive old shabby Federation style building that they’ve divided up into apartments. High ceilings, nice polished floors, and a decent sized 1 bedroom apartment that doesn’t hurt to pay rent on each fortnight (even if they keep increasing the bloody rent, it’s still cheaper than the majority of places out there in Sydney.)

I could get a newer place, with a nicer kitchen and bathroom, in a more secure fancy pants apartment building. But I like my crumbly old building. The staircase is the original oak from the 1800’s or whenever the hell this place was built and it’s got character.

It’s also good because the walls are like a foot wide so it’s relatively quiet and it stays cool during summer and warm during winter.

So, why is that even though there are walls that are solid brick (or cement, or something else solid) that I can still hear every time my fucking neighbour yawns? Why, I ask? Because he is the noisiest yawner to ever bloody live.

I mean Christ, I have double glazing windows and solid freaking walls yet still hear his sing song yawning every night.

Flaming heck.

I’m Christmas shopping at the moment, trying to do it all online this year. Partly out of laziness, and partly to avoid my standard Christmas shopping experience which is manically trying to find everything on Christmas Eve. While panic is indeed a great motivator I’m trying to be good. So far Dad is getting this bag, I figure he’s a librarian who would suit a nice man satchel type thing. Hope he likes it. Actually I’m still not speaking to him so if he doesn’t I’ll return it and buy shoes for me instead.

Win win!

Oh, you know how two of my new favourite top/blouses were stolen off my clothes line the other week? I totally won (won what I do not know yet, but follow me with it) because I found one of the blouses on sale for half price in my size over the weekend. Sucked in clothes stealers with great taste, sucked in!

George is still gorgeous, you know when children do that motion when they want to be picked up where they walk right in front of you and lift their arms up to be lifted? He does that now with me, very sweet. He’s still sleeping outside at night, but it’s kind of nice then when he does stay in side with his smoochiness.

I have a masquerade party thing to go to this weekend, so far the dress plan is to wear a normal dress and just buy one of those lame masks to match. I seriously hate themed parties, there is simply no need for them. I mean a party is a good thing right – friends + alcohol = good. Why ruin it with a silly dress code?

I had to go to the doctors tonight, and even though I booked an appointment for 15 minutes after they opened I still had to wait for 45 minutes, just to get my prescriptions renewed. I’d see if I could just call up and swing by to pick them up but my doctor kind of scares me, and I don’t think she’d be down with that. She has yet to see computers as required equipment and my ‘chart’ is written on a piece of paper in her old style Munich handwriting. So I just book an appointment, and then bring a book and try not to think about hurting an old lady because she won’t hurry the hell up.

Anyway my bed is calling, did you have a good weekend?


Tuesday Nov 18, 2008

Today is bad busy at work today. Although I have an awesome story of helping uncover some criminal charges against a co-worker, who then got walked off the premises yesterday.


That was pretty cool.


In the meantime I’ll leave you with some haiku’s, these are (obviously) the first I’ve written. I call them “Ode to the Broken Zipper on my Trousers” and “Ode to George – Stop Biting Mama.”



Oh faulty zipper!

Showing lucky underpants

Not so lucky now.




George! My puppycat

You drive me bloody mental

With all the biting


Wednesday Nov 12, 2008

Things I learnt at the wedding –


          There are a lot of cynical single women, who seem to not enjoy going to weddings. Maybe they enjoy it, but going by the amount of comments made about being single and where the good men are it sure as hell didn’t seem like it. Single and cynical is not pleasant, and tends to reek of desperation. I never felt so happy about being single as comparing myself to these couple of girls.

          I have aged well since high school. And by aged well I’ve just actually tamed my hair and like buying clothes. It’s good when you start off as a messy little indie kid, because the only way is up.

          I do love a nice wedding, even when the father of the groom hits on both you and your sister while their wife is metres away.

          By avoiding the dance floor all night, the bride is then happy for you just to dance for once song and sit down. Treat em’ mean.

          When you go to a dodgy disadvantaged high school even the girl who was most likely to succeed will end up having 2 children by mid 20’s and look shabby.

          This is mean, but when you have a superiority complex and claim to be better than everyone I will enjoy it when you’re tired and washed up by 27.


Except for a bit of a family meltdown at my father I had a nice weekend. It was a big weekend though and I’m a little tired.


Let’s see, what else. Work is okay, I think Beth is having issues settling in living with her boyfriend DJ, even if it is only temporarily.


We’re having drinks this weekend to catch up so hopefully things have a settled a bit for them by then.


George is fine, he no longer sleeps inside with me at night and I’m feeling a little like the mother of a teenager. Yet he’s all sweet and smoodgy in the mornings when I see him, which is better than constantly either being smothered by a sleeping cat who likes to sleep on my neck, or woken up at 3:00 a.m. to him clawing me for him to be let out. So maybe I got the better end of the deal.


Uh, plans for this weekend include a visit to the beautician so she can pour hot wax on me and hurt me, and then paying her for the privilege. Sleeping. Watching the many DVD’s I borrowed from DJ. Cooking, cleaning. Standard nice relaxing weekend I think.


What about you, what are you up to this weekend?


Lucy….thinks you’re an idiot.

Tuesday Nov 11, 2008


Most of the time I’d like to have the title of this post as my Facebook status. Not aimed at anyone in particular, just because it feels apt.

The wedding over the weekend was lovely. The bride looked lovely, the church was a gorgeous little church in the middle of the vineyards and the reception was in a vineyard where I drank some very very delicious champagne.

My dress was lovely, my shoes were definitely the sexiest out of everyone, it’s true the photographer said they were great too. (I’m in a very humble mood today, can you tell?)

Photos will be coming, but Dad was the only one with a camera. And I’m uh, not talking to him at the moment, so they will come later. When he pulls his head out of his arse, obviously.

I started writing this a few hours ago, but then we had a site down, modems fucking up and dying and I’m tired. So I’m going to go home, have a shower, change into tracksuit pants, and have a quiet night making George curl up with me.

friday night

Friday Nov 7, 2008

So I’m sitting at home with my Dad and sister on a Friday night watching Ghostworld. I know, you want to be me.

The wedding’s tomorrow in the Hunter Valley, I have the dress, I have the shoes. Now all I have to do is make it through the mini school reunion we’ve got going on. There will be in total 6 girls who I went to high school with who’ll be attending, 6 of whom I do not like. Luckily the bride kinda likes me so is sitting me in between my sister and dad, so I have a buffer zone. Luckily she likes me, since I broke her leg when we were about 4. Allegedly anyway. Who remembers what happens when you’re 4?


Turns out when I said to my sister to book us a little B&B, to her that meant a villa in a 5 star resort. Bloody snob. At least we’re in a separate room from the paternal snorer.

I am fucking exhausted, this week I’ve stayed up far too late playing my Nintendo DS. Lego Indiana Jones if you’re interested. Luckily I finished the game last night. Unluckily I downloaded a Harry Potter game today so it looks like I have to keep going with a little sleep.

Beth is looking after George for the wedding, she’s not a big fan of cats but as long as she feeds him I’m okay. Poor kitten.

I bought two new shirts last weekend. They were my new favourite blouses for summer. I went to get them off the line last night to wear this weekend, and they were gone. Someone stole my goddamned shirts, who does that? I’m the only chubby girl in the apartment block so it’s not like if some girl in the building took it that they could wear it. And if it was a stranger why steal my new black blouse and purple blouse? Wwhhhhyyy?

Also don’t washing line clothes stealers take underwear or something? I had quality lucky underpants on the line. And they also left my Goodies t-shirt. Why take two awesome tops and leave the Goodies? Bad taste I say.

Anyway I’m beat, so I’m off to sleep in the single bed I slept in for my teen years, and wake up everytime I turn over.

hello ladies….

Tuesday Nov 4, 2008

It’s been a busy week. And yes, I realise it’s only Tuesday, thank you very much.

Friday night I had a few drinks at the Lenin Bar, god bless you vodka bar, bless you. I had 3 drinks and toddled home slightly sloshed before pouncing on the UnsuitableBoy (unsuitable because he is an ex.)

Apparently George is cooler than I thought as even though he’s terrified of other people he smooched up against UnsuitableBoy in bed and tried to sleep on him.

UnsuitableBoy is allergic to cats.


(It won’t be a regular thing, he is still as emotionally retarded as ever. I like him still, I have to be to make out with you, but I don’t like like him anymore. So all good.)

Saturday morning I got a frantic call from the bride of the upcoming wedding. A week before her wedding and she hadn’t seen her dress, and they weren’t entirely sure where the dress was as it was kinda lost in transit. She hadn’t had a bridezilla moment (she’s a sweetheart) but she pulled a tearful tantrum and they managed to locate it. Since she was on her own I went with her to see the fitting. It’s beautiful but still not entirely what she wanted and the correct lace is coming from Hong Kong. Whether they’ll get it done in time I hope to God so. If they don’t I’ll be naming and shaming them.

Make my friend cry damned bridal boutique.

Then after I went and helped Beth move. It sucked, moving always does. She’s moving in with DJ for a few months to do a trial living together thing, if it works out they’ll move out and get their own place. He was tremendously excited, Beth a little nervous. But I did manage to steal a Goodies t-shirt from him. Seriously, that man has got more t-shirts than I have clothes.

Then there was pizza and beer and bed. Nice.

I bought shoes to go with the dress for the wedding this weekend, they are gorgeous and coincidentally (read: no coincidence) they match the new bag Sophia I bought.


Hello ladies.

(They look white, but they’re a cream canvas material.)

This weekend I’m heading to the Hunter Valley for the wedding with my Dad and sister. I grew up with Bec, have known her since we were babies and the idea of seeing her get married makes me want to cry. In a good way but cry nontheless.

I also have to see a buttload of girls we went to school with. Half of them I can’t stand, so that should be interesting. And by interesting I mean I’d prefer to stab myself with a fork than make small talk with them. But it’s B’s wedding so it’s not about me.


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