The Antilogy |

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Sunday Mar 30, 2008

I’ve been ordered to go home by my manager (I am horrendously stressed out at the amount of work I’ve got and she’s doing the right thing by sending me home before I almost burst into tears telling her I have too much stuff to do – God, how lame) so I’ll make this quick –

– The bearded boy and I are friends.
– This depresses me more than I can articulate.
– I spent the first half of today helping with a new site set up and things were forgotten and fucked up by the project manager and it was not a pleasant way to start the week.
– I am thinking that I would be better of being a lesbian, except that the idea of being with a girl sexually makes me nauseous.
– I am not PMSing, but thanks for asking.
– I’m going to go home, have a bath and possibly listen to dome Joy Division and Jeff Buckley.

Ps – At least my hair looks good today, and the weather was lovely?

(This is me counting my blessings, I’m trying okay, so fuck off)


Wednesday Mar 26, 2008

I hate the phrase “when it rains it pours”, because really? Stupid fucking obvious phrase.

You know how I met the long haired tattooed boy (okay, that’s too long to type every time, I shall call him Van Halen) Van Halen on the weekend right? So this weekend gorgeous bearded man will be staying at my apartment. He’s moving to Sydney from interstate and I offered my place as a crash pad if he needed it, and he needs it. So there will be a boy under my roof for two nights and two days.

Who I like.

Quite a lot.

We’re looking at apartments Saturday and then heading out to drinks with the kids Saturday night. Beth needs to meet him to find out if he’s actually interested in me or if it’s just wishful thinking. And because I am rubbish at boys, I’m so often in the ‘Friends Zone’ with them that I am completely clueless in reading actually interested signs.

Work is insane at the moment, I hate to say it but these 4 day weeks are killing me. I’m having to do 10-11 hour days in the office and logging in at home at night to even keep afloat. I have a meeting with the big boss tomorrow and I’m going to demand/plead for an assistant. The one I half use at the moment is not the greatest.

God help any person who has to report to me.

No really, send prayers their way.

George is lovely (right now anyway, he’s discovered toilet paper and when I came home tonight he’d destroyed half a roll of the double length stuff), he’s asleep on my arm as we speak. He’s gotten bigger and I’ll have to post some pictures soon.

I turn 27 in a month, I’m quite happy about it. All I know is I’m enjoying 27 far more than 17 and life is far settled than it was. At 17 I moved to a country town with the Mormon Housewife to study law, I earned less than $5000 all year, I was spending far too much time in Placebo chat rooms, starting a fierce smoking habit and being fiercely homesick and slightly unhappy. It was one of the best years I’ve had but I like where I am now.

Anyway I’ll let you know how the weekend goes if I don’t post before then.

long weekend

Monday Mar 24, 2008

4 day long weekends are bloody fantastic. Thursday night I spent far too much time in the pub drinking beer and lamenting being back at work and not in Fiji.

Friday I think I spent most of the day in bed watching the real estate/home channel on TV. The only concession to getting dressed and/or hygiene was when I had a shower in the afternoon and changed into new pyjama’s. Oh and I ate a couple of easter eggs I was supposed to give to friends.

Saturday had breakfast with Adam in Glebe, I’ve discovered a fantastic cafe that does this potato and chorizo stack/bake thing with their breakfast and it makes me to cry it’s so good.

Saturday night was cocktails at Beth’s house. It’s amazing how quickly cocktails can turn a party so messy so quickly. Well, that and not knowing the metric conversion for an ounce can have disasturous results for an alcoholic drinks.

I played Weezer and the Sex Pistols on guitar hero and then somehow I was back at DJ’s (Beth’s tatttooed boyfriend) house watching Lost with his flatmate. And uh, said vow was broken. I mentioned him a while back, he’s covered in tattoo’s and has long hair and is an absolute sweetheart. I doubt anything more than casual will come of it, which is fine with me.

Today I bought a new lounge from Freedom. It’s caramel coloured and is super deep and has a kick ass day bed style chaise. It is definitely the most comfortable and sexy piece of furniture I (will soon) own when it’s delivered in a few weeks.

And tomorrow I have to go back to work and I have no more chocolate left and it makes me sad. Anyone who wants to give me chocolate gets my eternal grateful and a tongue kiss.


Saturday Mar 22, 2008

A quick update – the vow has officially ended.

Thank God.


Wednesday Mar 19, 2008

So, you know how I’m doing (WHICH I SHOULD HAVE FINISHED BY NOW!) this vow? So for the last 3.5 months there’s been no physical contact (beyond sleeping with George and forcing Beth to slow dance with me at the wedding) with any boy?

And the reasons for doing it are to really get over this gorgeous bearded M who is just not the right boy for me?

Guess who decided to come visit me a day before the 3 months finished? Who turned up at my house, unannounced, at 3:30 a.m. the day before I flew to Fiji?


Is there an internal twinge that goes off whenever a girl is millimetres away from getting over you?

Anyway I yelled at him for a few reasons –

1. It was 3:30 a.m. and he scared the living hell out of me.
2. For waiting 3 months to tell me he missed me.
3. For not apologising for how badly he left things the last time I saw him.
4. I hadn’t had any spoon on 3 months and that makes me cranky.

It felt good.

In other news George bit me on the nose last night (it’s small but it hurt) he is a bloody nuisance and a few nights ago he massacred my leg by falling off it but clinging to my skin the whole way day. I have 12 different scratches that match up to each of his little paws desperately trying to get a hold. Turns out he misbehaved very badly while staying with Dad while I was on holidays. He pretty much destroyed his house, kept him awake most nights and..uh…peed all over his house.

I called Dad on Friday afternoon to tell him I’d landed safely and he eagerly asked if I wanted him to make the nearly 2 hour drive that night to drop George off. I think it’s safe to say Dad will not be volunteering to take George again any time soon. Anyone want to babysit a hyper and mischievous cat occasionally?

Anyway work is a nightmare, I’ll be here until god knows when tonight but I just went and bought a cookie so I should be okay. I also plan to eat a lot of chocolate this weekend with the whole celebration of Jesus’ resurrection thing. And then Sunday we’re hitting Ikea where I plan to spend a lot of money on more storage boxes and photo frames.

Good times.


Monday Mar 17, 2008

So. This Fiji holiday of mine. It was awesome and lovely and relaxing. 10 whole days of nothing but lazing by the pool, drinking cocktails, afternoon naps and great food.

I did give myself sunstroke the second night and had to bow out early to die of a headache and throw up, so that was fun. But I was right as rain the next day. And there was an unfortunate incident with a shop window, which I uh, headbutted at a great speed.

Turns out my spatial awareness is even worse than I thought, one moment I was leaning forward to look at this beautiful black pearl necklace, the next moment I was aware of a tremendous pain and a loud bang that my head had made, with my friends laughing at me and the shop assistants looking at me in horror. I must have been coming in at speed too. So I got an egg on my head, another wicked headache and a mark of my head left on the shop window for the rest of the trip.

The weather was beautiful, we got maybe a day of rain spread out over a couple of days.

Unfortunately the worst downpour was reserved for the day of the wedding and we had to move the outdoor ceremony indoors. It was also bad because I had to wear proper shoes for the only time in 2 weeks. However I kicked those babies off as soon as the reception started.

Me and the Lesbian decided to be those girls at the wedding, and by those I mean drunk and unruly. We got drunk and unruly, unfortunately so was everyone else so it wasn’t really as awesome as planned. I did catch the bouquet though, turns out though that this bouquet had been made with metal spikes on the top and I got spiked when I caught it. I wandered around making jesus and stigmata jokes for at least a couple of days later, it’s the little things people.

I also went jet skiing (I was riding with the tattooed boyfriend and he was going way fast despite promising he wouldn’t. Apparently you could hear me screaming from shore) and I went snorkelling (I forgot to put sunscreen on and got painfully burnt along my back and arse. I have my bikini bottom seared into skin now in a tan line that I will have for a very very long time) and we went banana boat riding (you know in the opening of Jaws where the people are riding on that big inflatable banana looking thing? Yeah that. But all 5 of us came off like domino’s and there was some pain involved a slow swim back to shore as we all couldn’t get back on. We are lithe and graceful like that.)

I also met a boy on the snorkelling trip, I went on my own as I wanted to have a quiet day. He was nice and normal, and a good age. We agreed to meet at the pool the next day after breakfast.

I waited by the pool until after lunch before giving up and going back to my room for a nap. I totally got stood up! And I was totally prepared to end this vow too, and he missed out.

Anyway I’m totally brown, I spent way too much money at duty free so I am alcohol, nicotined and iPoded (I caved, damned that Bill Gates!) up. I’m back at work and it’s not too bad. I’d just much prefer to be lazing by the pool drinking cocktails right now though.

Anyway, how have you been? Your hair looks nice.


Sunday Mar 9, 2008

Right. This Fiji holiday thing is insanely perfect.

It is hot, like minimum 30 degrees even at night. But there are 3 pools in the resort and our room overlooks the ocean. Oh, and our air conditioning is set at a delightful 20 degrees 24 hours a day (What global warming?)

I am brown, way brown. And the sunburn I got on the first day has finally stopped being painful. Turns out lying next to pool in the sun for 5 hours is bad. I have also drunk my body weight in cocktails, not one pina colada but let’s just say our room tab (that we charge everything to, food, drink, activities) is now more than our flight and accomodation costs.

And we still have 3 or 4 days to go.

The wedding was beautiful, the bride was the best looking bride I’ve ever seen.

The groom?

Since he’s Beth’s little brother and he and I had this very sweet puppy love thing about a decade ago, I loved every minute of watching this now man get married. As place settings they had picture frames with a picture of him proposing (he proposed to her in a park and we were supposed to take photos of them without her knowing. A park ranger actually pulled us aside and was going to tell Beth’s brother and his girlfriend that two dodgy looking people were following them with a camera. Awkward.) with letters they’d written to the guest superimposed over the top of it.

His to me made me cry.

Out of the 6 or so days we’ve been here it has been boiling hot with no showers or rain. The afternoon of the wedding we had torrential downpours and had to move the ceremony indoors. As soon as they said I do it stopped raining. When we were getting the bride into her dress she was wailing that the rain was karma for being such a bitch. If she wasn’t so upset it would have been funny.

Actually no, it was still funny.

I also got horrendously drunk. I had a discussion with the Lesbian (formerly K but it’s easier this way) and we decided to be the messy girls at the wedding. Luckily so was everyone else so it wasn’t too bad.

I did catch the bouquet though. Beth, Lesbian and I formulated a plan to take out our biggest threats. And as karmic payback I caught it and got stuck by a metal spike that was holding the bouquet together. Right in the middle of my palm. So I was Jesus for a night, bleeding from my palms and worried about lead poisoning, because I had had a bajillion vodka’s and that’s what you worry about.

Anyway thought I’d drop in and say hello, I have a snorkelling thing at 11:00 (because that’s what you do on Monday mornings right?) and I have some cocktails to drink, skin to bake and naps to be had.

(Also, there are no single boys on this resort. None. There are couples and there are families and that is it. The cabana boys scare me because they’re twice my size, literally.)

(Oh, and there’s a couple of photos over at my Flickr page)

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