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Monday Aug 20, 2007

Quickly quickly, I’m stealing my Dad’s internet for a wee while before I head off to the “House of Mormon”. There will be no alcohol, but Meg keeps coffee there for me. Oh sweet rebellious Mormon friends. So far I’ve –

– Gone and visited my Grandma. Because I am a rockstar granddaughter I’m typing her memoirs for her. Let’s just say that I spent my 20th birthday giving myself alcohol poisoning, she spent it being shelled in Dover during the war. She is a tough cookie.

– Applied for a hideously large (to me) mortgage. Will have confirmation if we’ve got the house probably later this week.

– Slept for an average of 10 hours a day. My eye bags have receded and my eye twitch is no more.

– Tormented Dad’s cat for getting so fat (she is actually my old cat so it comes from a place of love) by singing Money by Abba, but replacing Money with Fatty. Dad says I’ll give her a complex. I say she’s a cat. Dad has long conversations with Lily, I think he likes it because she doesn’t talk back or argue with him.

– Going through baby photos of me and my sister with Dad and hearing a comment of “Ooh, Dad’s a little stoned in that one isn’t he?” introduces you to my hippy childhood.

– Also I was cute, no (I’m on the right)

And that’s all I’ve got time for, hope you’re being good.


Thursday Aug 16, 2007

Briefly –

– I finish up work tomorrow and the way this week has been going it can’t finish soon enough.

– Even if they did buy me this sexy little camera as a thank you gift.

– I’ve spoken before about you being able to buy my love, but when I see a manager bullying a work colleague purely because they can, and then having an argument with said manager about how their behaviour is disrespectful and fucking rude, money doesn’t smooth that one over.

– I have to hand back my wireless card and laptop tomorrow so for the near future (coupla weeks anyway) I’m out of internet love.

– I think raising an issue with someone, and then to have it turn around to become all about them, is one of the most frustrating things in the world.

– Because sometimes, and just sometimes, people have their own concerns and issues and just want to be able to voice them and not be not talked over.

– I have two weeks holiday starting Monday and I cannot wait. Like do not care about farewell drinks or any more work handover stuff. JUST WANT IT TO BE MONDAY ALREADY.

– The holiday will involve not going on holidays but lots of sleeping, and cooking, and reading and watching movies, and drinking. See previous point about my excitement levels of this.

Anyway kids I’m out for a while, be good.


Tuesday Aug 14, 2007

I found out a guy I work with is straight. This isn’t a grand statement really, but I thought he was gay. And because I thought he was gay (he makes his own wine, brings in pastries he’s made, is well groomed and is just a very considerate, and let’s face it effeminate) I flirted with him because I thought he was safe! And because I thought he was just being friendly when it’s entirely possible I’ve been flirting, he’s been flirting back and NOW IT’S AWKWARD!

I finished work after 9 last night. I also ran out of cigarettes at around 6 pm. And I’d been there since 7:30. And I got to log on at 4:30 am this morning. I was supposed to go back to sleep and come into work late. But you know it took an hour to do what I needed to do and then I was wide awake due to the two coffees I needed to even remember all the goddamn network passwords. So I got to work at 6:30 am.

Moral of the story – Kids, do not work in IT.

In good news I only have 3 days left of work, I’m trying very hard to dodge any farewell drinks. I think I may be able to pull an Irish exit and just leave quietly after a couple of drinks on Friday as a few other kids are leaving so I don’t have to do the big “bye, keep in touch, absolutely we’ll catch up again soon” lies that come along with it. I just couldn’t be bothered, I’ve made a concerted effort to keep my work and social lives completely separate. I just don’t want people I have a professional relationship with knowing who I’m sleeping with, what I do when I’m rip roaringly drunk (that’s reserved for friends), who I want to sleep with and just generally stuff that you only get to know if I’m not paid to be civil to you.

So if I’ve been dodging having drinks with you for the year I’ve been working with you why do I have to spend my last night drinking with you? Wwhhhyy??

Also here is a photo of my hair at 5:00 am this morning. This is a public service announcement for all those girls who tell me they’d love to have curly hair.

Moral – You do not.

Although if you give me 20 minutes it looks like this (mind the scary stare and bags)

Not as much personality, yes, but you can at least step out in public without people thinking a time warp has come through and it’s the 80’s and perms are back in again.


Sunday Aug 12, 2007

– While wholemeal pasta is all healthy and good, and low GI and all that shit – but it tastes like arse.

– I’ve napped for a grand total of 7 hours this weekend and it has been glorious.

– This weather in Sydney has been delicious. I went out last night for dinner and drinks in Cockle Bay and wore a skirt and no jacket. It was awesome. And it’s still WINTER!

– I have drunk a lot of beer this weekend. Between that and the massive bowl of wholemeal pasta I’m lying on my lounge feeling like a beached whale. It’s hot.

– To the person who came here by googling “retching for over a month now” – go see a doctor. Like now, that shit can not be normal.

– I really shouldn’t have laugh at that search but I did.

– I think we’ve found a house. It gorgeous, and well priced and I think we’re going to make an offer.

– I was speaking to Beth last night about the 10 year school reunion we’ve got next year and how we wouldn’t miss it for the world. I have good memories from high school. I had great friends (including Beth and Meg), loved what I was learning and except for standard teen angst and douchebag people I don’t have any horror stories. Probably because I was pretty much the same as I am now. But with more angst. And bad skin. But kind hearted angst? I once punched a boy in the face because he was picking on a friend of mine. The one and only time I’ve been violent but it was worth it. Also I am terribly nosy so the idea of seeing who did well, who stagnated, who got married, who got hot, who got fat sounds awesome.

– Work has been busy, I’m liking the plan of keeping busy because if I stop and think that in a couple of weeks I’ll be starting a new job and will have a mortgage the idea makes me slightly dizzy.

– One of my friends told me she has a girlfriend last night. And by proxy gay. I almost cried I was so happy for her. I’d suspected she was, but she’s a private person and asking wasn’t my business. She won’t be telling her parents for now. They’re Catholic, and from a country town so she’s not ready for that yet. I get to meet the girlfriend next week. And when she’s ready we’re having a party celebrating her becoming a raging lesbian. It’s going to be awesome.

god, belligerent drinking, labour, drinking

Tuesday Aug 7, 2007

After dealing with the complete arseholes I work with all day I couldn’t wait to leave work tonight.

So I came home and washed all of my walls and blinds with sugar soap.

It’s all good clean fun at Casa de Lucy.

Shouldn’t it be when you resign from a job that you get to slack until you finish? Aren’t they the rules? I’m not getting to slack yet, this week is nuts, but the plan for next week is long lunches, shopping in my lunch break, coming in late and leaving early.

And then on the week off, after I get this house hunting shizzat out of the way, I have a plan to have a least a couple of days where I’m drunk by early afternoon. Now, this plan hopefully involves drinking during the day with friends. But because I believe in achieving the goals you set in life if I have to do it on my own then I’m dragging a blanket out to my backyard and drinking on my own until I start yelling at overhead planes and my neighbours for being noisy. Ahh belligerent drunkenness, is there anything better?

Also Meg had her second baby. She had a 2 and a half hour labour. Her first child was a 2 hour labour from first contractions to delivery. Now, she’s a Mormon so she has God on her side. But if that’s what it takes for a 2 hour labour then point me in the direction of the nearest LDS worshippy place. Seriously, my sister put my mother through 27 hours of labour. I’m going with God if there’s a chance won’t happen.

So I’ll heading to the Mormon household to corrupt the toddler and nibble on the babies toes and try and make Meg drink wine. Another good plan.

And this weekend I plan to finally get horrendously drunk with the work kids (because really, I only have one more week to go, how little could I care if I make a fool of myself?) Friday night, dinner at I’m Angus Saturday with beer and steak and Sunday sleeping it off.

Good times.

saturday stuff

Saturday Aug 4, 2007

You know what I hate more than working on a Saturday?

Being in the office by 7 for a couple of hours, coming home for a few hours, and then having to come back into the office in the afternoon for a few hours. That blows. Destroys the whole day. Plus destroyed any potential napping time.

Although I did get given a free case of some girly fizzy blood orange vodka type drink from my brother in law. So the plan for my Saturday night is watch Empire Records, drink as much sugary alcohol as I can stand (or until I can’t stand), browse youporn and then pass out.

And because I have the attention span of gnat tonight below are two posts that I’ve found recently that make me sad that I could either never write something as beautiful as Audrey did or that I could meet the type of boy who would do the first post like Sarah Brown.

“One night in college, I woke up alone in my dorm room, sweaty and shaking from a horrible dream. It was so terrifying that several minutes later, I still couldn’t turn off the light and go back to sleep, so I called my boyfriend, who went to a different college in a different town.

I woke him cold from a dead sleep, and told him I’d had a bad dream. The minute I said it out loud, I realized what a baby I sounded like, but without missing a beat, he cleared his throat and said, “Okay, lie back down. You can leave the light on if you want. Pretend like all the guys in Pavement are hanging out in your dorm room. Don’t let Malkmus too close to the bed. Now pretend like Yo La Tengo is there too. Ira’s just sitting there on your desk, feet on the chair, talking to Kim Deal. Frank Black is there too, but he’s on the other side of the room, reading the book titles off your shelf. Bob Pollard is drinking all of your beers. Thurston Moore is playing 20 Questions with MCA. Beck is chatting up Laura Ballance. Everyone’s just hanging out, chilling. And right by the door, standing guard, is Kim Gordon. And sweetheart, nothing is coming through that door, because nobody wants to fuck with Kim Gordon.”

Audrey from Audrey and the Bad Apples wrote the below after her mother had passed away recently and even though I saved it a few weeks ago it still hurts my heart when I read it.

“How the strength of a mother’s love could reach out from one side of the world to the other and rock you to sleep. It’s the place deep inside herself where we she took us the instant we were created and said, “Here. This room is our room. No matter where I go, you can always find me here.”


Friday Aug 3, 2007

1. I got me some 4 hours sleep last night.

2. I went and saw Ash play with Chesty La Rue.

3. I also drank a wee dram of alcohol.

4. Although I was okay when I got to work, by lunchtime I wanted people to die just so I’d have some peace and quiet.

5. I’m getting a ‘bonus’ from work for being awesome. I think it’s probably more likely they’re grateful for work I’ve done and realise they should’ve made me permanent months ago so I wouldn’t be leaving but I’m going with the awesome angle.

6. Our CIO resigned this week, as I like and respect the hell out of this man, it’s only re-affirmed my resignation. If I hadn’t of resigned by now I would’ve now anyway.

7. The reason for work faffing about making me permanent was because the CIO wanted to take me with him to his new job. I told you I was awesome.

8. I have to be at work tomorrow at 7. On a Saturday. Ridiculous.

9. I sang so much last night that my throat is hoarse.

10. I left the following message on my sisters voicemail today –

“I am wearing high waisted pants! With pleats! People are losing sight and the will to live when they see me! How many more fashion don’t’s can I do today! Btw, you better have called Mum for her birthday.”

Seriously, short of chubby chicks in lycra or black stockings with white runners I couldn’t have picked a fashion don’t pair of trousers. (They do look cute but still, high waisted and pleats?)

11. Also ankle boots make no one look good. They are a vile smear on the history of footwear and if you’re wearing them and I see you I only have one thought in my head – Cankles.

12. God I’m tired.

13. I’m starting to freak out about starting the new job. Standard stuff really, what if I destroy my professional reputation, and Adam’s for recommending me, because I am shit house and I can’t handle it? What if I get sacked because I am crap?

14. I’m also going to be reporting to a female manager for the first time. It could be great, could be awful. We’ll see.

15. I really need to turn off the true crime show I’m watching because I plan to be in bed soon and I would like to sleep at some point without thoughts of creepy criminals.

16. Yep, bed.

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