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nice work lucy

Tuesday Oct 31, 2006

Well, colour me stunned.

I get involved with a boy who is a douchebag.

I really should get better taste in boys.

I’m learning though, whereas before I would have fallen in love with him anyway and had a messy dysfunctional courtship for 6 months, and then pined for him for another 6, I politely told him to go away after the first pronounced bout of douchebaggery.

Baby steps people, baby steps.

A progress score on Lucy’s daily life –

Smoking – Yes (I’d put a disclaimer of only at night but really give it time before it leaks into daily activities.)

Drinking – No (I even skipped trivia last night)

Gym  – No (I carry around my gym clothes but actually getting their on time is still a problem)

Diet – Excellent

General State of Mind – Rubbish.

Social Life – Rubbish (By choice though – My little social jaunt I was on has taken a break, which is great for my liver. I guess I just needed a break and just want to potter around at home.)

Oh well, I always have work to occupy my time 11 hours a day.

Man that’s depressing.


neither big nor clever

Saturday Oct 28, 2006

I’m at home having a quiet night and I cannot describe how delicious it is.

I haven’t been to the gym since I started the new job so I was actually pumped to go this morning (Let’s leave how lame that sentence is shall we?).

But because I drank too much and stayed out too late Friday night I woke up at 11:00 and the gym closes at 12 I went and ate a big fuck breakfast instead at Brekky . Way easier and more enjoyable than sweating.

Then I came home and watched –

– When Harry Met Sally (The story could’ve been based on all of my relationships, but without the happy ending)
– Friends With Money (An over 40 chick flick)
– Brokeback Mountain (You can tell it’s a man love story when after 20 years they still haven’t said I love you)

And because I am in awe of Nigella Lawson I made chorizo and pepper pasta and then because I am Betty Homemaker I went to the nursery and bought more herbs for my windowbox.

See, domestic and boring.

Work is finally becoming enjoyable. I caught up for lunch this week with my old mentor and she blasted me for not calling her for help over the last month. I am an idiot because i didn’t even think of calling her for help. And this woman has been the single biggest help in my career and the most supportive colleague I’ve ever had. My stubbornness is breathtaking sometimes. Beth was saying last night that peer pressure was never an issue for me because I simply didn’t believe in it, I saw peer pressure as people telling me what to do. The stubbornness of Lucy meant that was never an option of doing what people told me to simply because they said I should.

I needed tonight off, between not going to the gym and drinking far too much beer I needed a break. Besides drinking excessively is neither big nor clever.

Tomorrow is a BBQ and drinks. I get to wear a dress and sit in the sun (providing it’s not blowing a bloody gale like it is now) and hang out with the kids.

What was your weekend like?


testify

Monday Oct 23, 2006

Now, I don’t think I’m a demanding girl in what I ask for in a boy.

What I need in a boy is relatively low key –

– Be honest with me (and that doesn’t include lying by omission or just not telling me the truth)
– Be into me.
– Be taller than me.

See, that’s actually quite pitiful. But the things that are frequently on other girls lists are not for me, I just don’t care about what he looks like, what he earns, what he drives/if at all, where he lives, what he does.

What I do care about is when that list is so bloody short that I still manage to find/attract/get involved with boys who find loopholes on the list (i.e. I just won’t contact you, that way I don’t have to tell you the truth or what’s going on, even though it will totally affect you) and I really wish I could stop. Because fuck, how boring.

Today was the day at work that I enjoyed.

I know, hallelujah and testify and all of that stuff. I left just after 6 and I felt good.

Tomorrow night is Trivia night where I get to drink beer and be a know it all and it’s encouraged.

Sweet.


friday night cab update

Friday Oct 20, 2006

Because I am officially a retarded corporate whore I’m writing this from my laptop in the back of a cab while heading to Coogee for drinks.

Today was a day I actually felt in control at work.

And by control I mean not feeling like I’m completely incompetent and making shit up and hoping that it’s right.

And by that I mean I almost enjoyed doing my job today.

Colour me stunned.

The dating thing from yesterday (or some other day) was interesting. Only one person went over a 15 year age gap ( Thom’s a whore so he doesn’t count :))

This was a result of a boy from my weekly pub trivia deciding I’m kinda cool and having a crush on me. Never mind the fact that he’s 21 and looks like the Comic Book Guy from the Simpsons (not that’s there’s anything wrong with chubby nerds, I mean hell without them I’d never get to make out with boys). I don’t know, I think boys at my age can (in the nicest possible way) be really goddamn annoying and to go younger just seems like asking for pain and more frustration

Or maybe like banging your head against a brick wall, and then deciding to keep going when given the option to stop.

Anyway I’m almost there and I have a beer waiting.

xoxo


detest

Wednesday Oct 18, 2006

Ok, so I’m totally not going to post photos of the dress, my legs or my breasts (thank you Mark.)

I know, terribly unreasonable of me.

This is my first night home in a while with no alcohol. I actually didn’t want to have a quiet night, which is completely at odds with me normally. And I figured out why.

I hate my job.

I’m overwhelmed, I’m stressed, I’m working hard and I dread going to work. I’m naturally hard on myself, but these guys have been expecting an unreasonable amount from me when I still haven’t been there 3 weeks. My boss tells me to not stay too late yet gives me deadlines that I have no choice but to stay back. He tells me to use any resource I need but I still don’t know what everyone does let alone how they can help me.

And when I’m at home doing nothing I tend to think about it more and stress out more.

I haven’t spoken about it huge amounts of detail because I want to give it a chance.

But so far if I’ve seriously contemplated quitting everyday for the last 3 weeks, how much time do I give it? I know I need to give it a chance but fuck, it has to get better than this.

Apart from that in all honesty life is actually really sweet. This major project I got thrown into managing at work has been delivered before the deadline and despite major fuck ups (not mine). They’re really happy with my work, I’m spending as much time as possible with my friends and my pay means I can shop a lot. I’ve put my foot down and refused to work this weekend so I’m heading down to see the relatives and hang out my the paternal and the sister.

I’ve been catching up with old friends, and getting to know them all over again and I really am enjoying everything apart from the work stuff.

So a question for you – what’s too old for you to date?

My line is if he’s old enough to be my father then wanting to get in my pants is disturbing to me (I’m 25)


10

Sunday Oct 15, 2006

1. – I broke the drought today. Oh yes indeed.

2. My name is Lucy Antilogy and I’m an alcoholic. – I haven’t had a ‘dry’ night in coming up to weeks now and I’m loving the pants off it.

3. I abhor people who because it’s their opinion that must make it fact. I had a very irritating conversation with Transformer (Beth’s new inked boy) tonight about whether The Da Vinci Code was any good – I’d just watched the movie and thought it was terrible, especially because I enjoyed the book. The conversation was that he thought it was rubbish because he didn’t like it and the author is selling it as fact when it’s obviously bullshit.

I don’t often like to end a discussion with ‘Come back to me when you’ve read it and know what you’re talking about and I’ll listen to what you have to say” but I totally fucking did. Have an opinion. Awesome. Base an entire argument on something that you haven’t even read, let alone looked into a little because it was interesting?Makes you a twat.

4. I realised that my days are broken into –

12 hours a day – Work
8 hours a day – Sleeping
1 hour a day – Travelling to work/home
= 21 hours a day meaning 3 hours a day are mine.

That is wrong on so very many levels.

5. I took this job because I’m a corporate whore and wanted more money. I got a 50% pay increase and so far have barely touched my bank account. That’ll teach me for selling out.

6. I wore a dress today in public voluntarily. And I got compliments. So because I am awesome I’m going to buy more frocks. And while I’m there use the word frock more often.

7. I don’t write here as often as I’d like, this should change when I put my foot down at work and start leaving at 6:00-6:30 pm.

8. I have got to stop drinking so much goddamn beer, because all the salads and sushi for lunch don’t change the fact that beer is bloody fattening.

9. I guess I’ll just have to switch to vodka then.

10. That’s all I had, but i like the number 10 so you know *shrug*


sorry about that

Wednesday Oct 11, 2006

Oh right.

The drunken “cliff hanger” post that since I wrote have been owned by work. All I know is even though it’s Wednesday I’ve already done a standard 40 hour week.

But the boy?

Just after I wrote that post he sent me a couple of messages making sure I got home ok and saying how excited he was about the picnic and would give me a call in the morning to work out a time.

I know, awwwww right?

And then he actually called in the morning, and said he needed to go into work for an hour or two in the morning but would be finished by midday and he’d call and come and pick me up.

And I haven’t heard from him since.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.
.

What the fuck? Who does that?

I can understand the no call in the morning and leaving it as a great drunken night. I understand that and I would’ve written it off as a great night.

But to then call sober and go ahead with the arranging?

To make the ‘confusing boy’ week complete I heard from the last two exes on Tuesday night both wanting to meet up. One I hadn’t seen in a few months, the other in nearly 2 years and neither of them I had planned on seeing again. I actually asked one if they sensed when to call just when things were at their weirdest.

Naturally he said no.

So, boys?

I adore you but seriously stop messing with my head.


oh yes

Friday Oct 6, 2006

1. Today at work I got forwarded this email from my boss that someone had written about me –


“Hi Boss,

Great choice on selecting Lucy to fill (Previous Person)’s role, I just wanted to say she is brilliant & an absolute pleasure to work with.

Kind regards
Lovely Women I work with:

Although I still hate the job i love this woman and appear to be fooling someone with my expert title. I’ve spent the last two weeks busy as fuck trying to work out what the hell I’m doing and praying that I don’t bugger up too badly. And I’m being deadly serious that I’ve been assuming at some point my boss was going to come up to me and say, “Hey Luce, you’re really not qualified for this are you? Maybe it’d be best if you just left ok.”

It was nice to hear I seem to be doing something ok.

2. I just got home from muchos beer and caprioska’s (and mixung beer and spirits is neither big nor clever) Anyway I met a boy. Actually he’d probably be described as a man – he was wearing nice shoes, a pin striped suit and a fucking fantastic watch and is a consultant (and no I still don’t know what he does)

He was smart and funny and tremendously cute. He argued with me about law and totally didn’t back down because I argue like a pit bull (latch on and not let go). I think I have a date with him. A picnic in a beautiful Sydney park tomorrow for lunch. When I left he went, “Yes, we’ll have a picnic. I’ll bring the wine and cheese. And then we can make out a little.”

Oh yes, he’s a keeper indeed.


the boring revelations

Wednesday Oct 4, 2006

Discoveries I’ve made this week –

– A new job is just like the old job. At the end of the day work is work.

– My liver can only handle drinking every second night for approximately 2 weeks. It then starts to hurt.

– The boys I now work with aren’t as nice as the ones I used to work with.

– I’m over doing long days and I only started a week ago.

– The news of the British boy band Five reforming has literally been the best news I’ve heard all day. For serious.

– I have to stop shopping, right now I drink, I work and I shop. Which even for me is far too fucking cliched to be cool.

– A former boy of mine has made contact after a year and a half. The discovery being that we’re going to catch up and bad things (and by bad I mean bad/good) will happen and in all honesty I’m not too fussed.

– All the free coffee in the world doesn’t make up for the fact that I’m not liking the new job.

– This saddens me, but depresses me since I’m contracted there for the next 6 months.

– I went out to play trivia last night and drank beer and ate a burger, and talked with Beth’s new boyfriend Inked Transformer boy and I had a good night.

– My inner voice/my conscience/my whatever sounds exactly like Jay of Jay and Silent Bob. You know the voice inside your head that tells you you’re retarded when you say the wrong thing to the boss, or gives you a virtual frat boy high five when you do something awesome? Yeah, mine sounds like Jay. And he swears a lot.

– I need sleep and it’s only gone 9:00 p.m.

– Man this career stuff is boring.


bad beatle cover songs

Sunday Oct 1, 2006

Like covering Beatles songs badly, I found messy drunks unacceptable.

That’s a very proper way of saying people that get drunk and cry or have deep and meaningful conversations with me shit me.

Now, belligerent drunks. At least they’re funny with the yelling and cursing. Those I can deal with and laugh at behind their backs, especially if they use creative cursing.

But last night after muchos hours drinking/watching crap AFL final games/eating/drinking daiquiris/karaoke Beth and I got bailed up by a drunken girl who proceeded to drunkenly stumble and slur her way through a painfully boring bloody drunken emotional rant.

Here’s my take on this – if I’m not feeling up to it, or I’m a little emotional I do what I’m doing tonight. After a huge few weeks things have hit home and I’m tired and a little overwhelmed. So when my friends call from the pub telling me to come out I don’t.

I either stay at home and watch Love Actually, or stay at home, watch Love Actually, drink wine and blog. Both scenarios involve cardigans and my lounge. People who are friends or even complete strangers do not need to hear my emotional shit. Because people have got their own shit and are probably doing everything they can to keep their own stuff together.

Otherwise while you’re either forgetting you drunkenly sobbed on some girls shoulder you only met a couple of times before, or cringe when you think of it, I’m writing about and it and putting it on the Internet like normal people.


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