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"expert"

Friday Sep 29, 2006

Right. So this new job malarkey.

It is stressful, and busy, and tiring, and scary as all fuck.

And I’m enjoying myself immensely.

They provide a lot – free yoga classes/coffee/laptops/blackberries/brand new offices/state of the art technology.

They also expect a hell of a lot of me. It’s quite nice.

I’m being touted as an ‘expert’. It seriously makes me giggle, except when they’re asking my advice on how to do things and I feel like sitting them down, taking their dhand and asking –

“You really want my advice on this?

I had Nutella and wine for dinner last night, and this morning while putting on my underwear I tripped over.

So let me ask you again – Are you sure I’m the ‘expert’ for you?

Tomorrow morning will be a slight sleep in and then the office. Then after I’m loading Darth (my super black bbq) and heading to a friends place for a poolside bbq tp watch the AFL Grand final. I don’t follow any football except soccer, so I imagine I’ll drink some beer, invent a new cocktail containing vodka ,pink grapefruit juice and cranberry juice, swim a little, and eat and then maybe fall asleep by the pool.

But hey, I’m an expert.


and wireless!

Wednesday Sep 27, 2006

Holy crap. Very quickly –

– I finished my old job yesterday and started my new job today.
– It was awesome, my new company has it’s own freaking full time barista who makes us coffee! Free coffee! Dude.
– I got given the cutest Imate and the teeniest little laptop that fits in my normal handbag.
– And so far (fingers crossed) nothing I saw/read/learnt today had me thinking,“Oh fuck, I have no idea what that is”.

I just got home from work though so I’m going to bed.


ese`?

Saturday Sep 23, 2006

I work with TheBoyWho, he’s from one of our interstate offices. Most conversations we have last far too long, and generally after we hang up we have to call back as we forgot to discuss the work issue we called about in the first place.

Lately conversations are guaranteed to involve us teaching each other swear words in other languages (yesterday he taught me whatever in Greek, I taught him the C bomb in Polish) and also us having almost complete conversations in other languages.

So while doing some handover with the new girl at my desk last week we had a quick conversation and afterwards she turned to me and asked if I spoke Spanish.

The problem being of course that although his background is Italian we don’t speak a word of Spanish and he was speaking Greek (and by speaking Greek I mean he was speaking normally with a heavy Greek accent). And I was really just using a mixture of phrases stolen from Taco Bell ads.

I worry more that my Replacement, that I chose, thought we were actually having a conversation in actual Spanish than talking complete shit at work when I should have been doing work.


missed that memo

Wednesday Sep 20, 2006

Right. So I sold my soul to my company. As evidenced by spending nearly every waking moment there so far this week.

Isn’t it supposed to be when you finish up at a company that you’re supposed to slack off? Surely that’s the rules.

But between training up my replacement, wrapping up all of my projects, documenting everything I do, and being handed a major project that would normally take a few weeks that I have to do before Tuesday when I leave and trying to learn the new jobs network I’m tired.

I’m looking forward to starting the new job just so I can focus solely on one job only and maybe do less than 14 hour days. That would rock.

But.

I am in love with spring. (Wait, is it spring in Sydney yet?) The nights are warm and balmy, jasmine and honeysuckle is everywhere, I get to wolf down my lunch sprawled out in the park near my work, and beer tastes super sweet.

And as I resolve each year at this point – I plan to spend most of this summer intoxicated, at the beach or making out with a gorgeously nerdy boy.

Give me those things, hell give me the drunken and the making out, and I will be a very happy girl.

People at work are planning farewell lunches and drinks for me and I’m trying to get out of it. Turns out people actually thought my cantankerous nature was charming, bless. I’m not a huge fan of work socialising, I’m at work with people I’m paid to be with so when I finish I’m out of there to spend time with my friends. Or my bed. Or couch. I network when I’m paid to and that’s as far as I go.

Bed is calling.


auditioning

Sunday Sep 17, 2006

I went out last night with Beth and hung out with new people and it was awesome. I’ve had the same friends since high school, i.e. Meg and Beth, and I adore them. But it’s nice to expand the social circle. These people were funny and cool and it was just so bloody refreshing to meet people who you’re instantly relaxed around.

The girls were non bitchy and cool, the boys funny and laid back.

I met Beth’s new tattooed cute new boy. He is completely smitten with her and it was nice to see a boy honest and open, I’ve yet to see that so it’s cool. Plus he adores Ash and Evan Dando so I kinda like him.

I was home by 9:30 last night but waking up this morning I found 2 free t-shirts commemorating the birthday of the pub we’d been to. From what I can remember you got a free t-shirt for every 6 drinks you had. I really really hope I got those t-shirts by flirting with the bar tenders.

I got told by Transformer boy (Beth’s new boy) that I was the coolest girl he’d met. To be vain and self serving I have heard this comment before, it just doesn’t translate too well with boys who would like to see me naked. Or who want me for my mind. Heh. Which really, if both those boxes are ticked I’m happy. Instead it comes from either boys who are in relationships, or those who see me as some younger sister type thing.

I’d prefer the naked scenario.

I bought ridiculously large glasses.

This break was exactly what I needed, I’m much more relaxed about the new job and the impending busy week ahead with handover to the new girl. I poached one of the admin girls to take over my current role, she is smart and efficient and organised and she’s going to do a great job.

All up things are going really well, summer has started, there is drinking, there are cute summer clothes to wear to show cleavage (exiled during winter) and as the FB is no longer around I’m auditioning for his replacement. All up, all good.


cadbury

Thursday Sep 14, 2006

So, I’ve got a couple of days off work. I figured if I’m going into a 6 month contracting….contract without paid leave I need a a mini break before I start. Right now I’m at my fathers house in his office battling terribly slow internet speeds. Bless him, I just upgraded his 200 MB plan to an unlimited.

Tomorrow and Saturday I’m spending with Meg and her gorgeous but ginger haired (I kid) daughter. I need a bit of relaxing time.

But then Saturday night is out with Beth to see if nice, normal boys can be found in Sydney. I think we can but I’m an eternal optimist 🙂

So no internet access for a couple of days.

I had pasta tonight, for someone whose been on a low carb diet thingy eating pasta is like coming home. I had a cigarette tonight after a few wines and now feel sick, I suppose that’s a good thing. Surely by now my liver would be trained up to last more than 3 glasses of wine but apparently I am a Cadbury and terribly girly because i want to sleep. Maybe have a sleepover but generally sleep.

Tomorrow i get paid and there will be shopping (mainly for new suits and grown up work attire but shopping is shopping really), and teaching Meg’s daughter that I am her Aunty Lucy who will corrupt her at any chance if Meg is not looking. It’ll be sweet.

Anyway play nicely kids.


princess

Monday Sep 11, 2006

I have got to stop reading Bill Bryson on the train. This morning at 7 a.m. on a packed train I was reading a particular page and I snorted.

I snorted while the train was deathly silent and after everyone turned around at me all I could do was mumble and raised the book and weakly say “, Heh, it’s…..uh….a…funny book. Heh”

Great way to start a Monday morning.

I also burped in front of a work friend. He was horrified. Never mind we’ve worked together for 4 years. He looked at me with this wounded look and said “I thought you were a princess Lucy.”

He was half joking about the princess but was genuinely weirded out.

This man has lived with his fiance for the past 2 years and is appalled by the idea of women having bodily functions. I’m sorry but his girlfriend never been sick around him, they share a bathroom, how is this normal?

I get being discrete and I am. But I didn’t mean to burp. But if I’m not in public or at work and I’m hanging out with my friends I’m going to burp, and I’ll probably rate it out of 10 too.

Does not mean I’m no longer a princess.

I’m totally a fucking princess.

Heh.


pike’s not a name, it’s a fish

Sunday Sep 10, 2006

– It has rained hard and heavy all weekend. Plus it’s cold. So this weekend has revolved around me staying in my lovely warm apartment, preferably my bed.

– I find it hard to respect your relationship when you cheated on your girlfriend with me and still call me when you’re drunk. You don’t respect it so can you see why I find it difficult? So if that makes me a sceptic, colour me sceptical.

– This weekend a friend of mine had a sleepover with a 32 year old guy who works in a record store. She’s a corporate whore, doing some city job that is complicated but obviously very important even though I don’t know exactly what she does. And it was like a fish and a bird mating, she was gobsmacked that he was happy working in a record store at 32, living like a student, where as he was blown away by how grown up she and her apartment were at 25.

As we’re relatively similar what we’re trying to figure out is what’s a typical 25 (or thereabouts) doing? What job do they do? Are we ‘grown up’ because we have our own furniture and earn a decent wage, and is this a good thing or a bad thing? Or are we boring sell outs to other mid twenties? I don’t know, but I never really consider myself grown up except when I’m paying rent and bills and then I just feel sad.

– I have a 3 day week this week with 2 days visiting one of my best friends from high school and university who is now married with a child. She is still just Meg to me. We talk about my crappy love life and stupid things I do and she vents about the family. It’s odd, although she’s never lived in Sydney I miss her when we go out, like she should be here and she’s just having a quiet night. She says I ground her, and remind her she’s still the girl I lived with where we’d roll joints, staying up all night sitting on the balcony smoking and commiserating on the silly boys we’d be involved with. And not just a mother and wife. Which is a good thing for both of us.

– I refuse to do the emo cutter thing here but I’ll look forward to when I start the new job and things settle a little because all of the changes have thrown me off balance and I’m finding it a little difficult. Besides cutters are lame and for livejournal.

– I went to the movies this afternoon with Beth and it was nice to catch up. She works in politics and works disgusting hours, with elections all over the place this has gotten worse so it’s nice to hang out without fighting for the attention of a minister or premier or prime minister.

– Fiji is booked in for March when my new contract starts. I don’t like cream in my cocktails but I am going to drink Pina Colada’s, Caprioska’s and Mojito’s for a solid week. If I sober up I will order another.

– Now, Beth and I are heading out next Saturday night. As we’re trying to avoid our regular haunts I’m looking for suggestions for great bars in the city/inner west that aren’t wanky that you guys would recommend. Any suggestions?


angry, dirty hipster, slothful, books, elizabeth bennet

Friday Sep 8, 2006

– I submitted my resignation, signed my new contract and everything’s settled.

– I walked into my bosses office with the resignation letter yesterday and he shook his head and said ” Nope, no can do. You can’t go.” I’ve asked that he not send out the obligatory email “It is with sad news I announce Lucy’s resignation blah blah”. I just can’t handle having 5 billion conversations all saying the same things. Seriously, most people know anyway. I’m already detaching from the people I work with, these guys are all around my age and I’ve worked with them since I was a 20 year old. I’m going to miss the hell out of them but I can’t have sadness on top of everything right now. Because apparently I assume I can choose which emotions I’m going to feel.

– I received a sexy email today. Terribly hot.

– Our new PA is pretty much the coolest girl I know, outside of Stella (seriously, most beautiful and smart and sassy and funny girl I know) of course.

Even her name is cool, actually fuck it I’ll use her real first name – Poppy. And she is everything I hoped I was at 19. Never mind she is awesome and funny and cheeky. Like the rest of the boys in IT I have a crush on her.

– I will be terribly glad when I have started my new job, purely because once I’m in a new situation I can handle it because I simply have to. All I have now is my new boss and ArchNemesis1 (who used to work at my current company but moved to my new company and helped me get this new role) asking me if I’m ready for a challenge and to be dropped in the deep end. And I feel like saying ‘Jesus fuck back off, you’re going to give me a heart attack before I even start.’

– This no drinking thing has been working out pretty well to be honest. No hangovers, no disgustingly huge bar tabs, no getting home trashed and tired at 3 a.m.

– Except for next weekend when I’m allowed to drink again and it’s game on.

(Technical question – Is anyone viewing this in Internet Explorer experiencing any difficulties? I normally use Mozilla and have no problem but while viewing it in IE the main page was blank.)

– I realised this week that if I was a character in a book I wouldn’t be someone whimsical like Anne of Green Gables or someone esteric and cool like a William Burroughs character. Oh no. I would be Elizabeth Bloody Bennet of Pride and Prejudice.

Proud, stubborn and a pain in the arse. And yes, save your “She ends up with Darcy’ arguments. Because we all know she probably would’ve worn him down just like Mrs Bennet does to Elizabeth’s father in a few years.

Being proud and argumentative is a flaw. I mean look, I wouldn’t want to be Jane Bennett either, I’ve just had a couple of major Elizabeth head strong moments this week and it does me no good at all. Plus it makes apologising or backing away from a point that is inaccurate feel like the hardest thing to do.

– My campaign to “Stop Reading Trashy Books” appears to be coming along quite nicely. So far this week I’ve finished Jane Eyre, read Naked Lunch by William Burroughs, a Marie Antoinette novel thing, and finally read The Catcher in the Rye. If I keep going I can turn into a profoundly deep dirty hipster who reads War and Peace for light reading. Wankers.

– My weekend is going to be slothful. Lucky because this horrendously cold and windy weather is settling in for the next few days. If you know me in real life you know that windy weather makes me angry, and I mean when I’m outside and it’s blowing a gale I get very very angry at the wind. Purely because it annoys me and messes up my hair and makes my work pass blow all around and look shut up.

I never claim to be rational but using this logic means I have been very angry this week. But all I have planned is breakfast with Beth, gym tomorrow morning and then nothing else but sleeping, watching DVD’s and drinking coffee.

It’s going to be so sweet.


pap

Wednesday Sep 6, 2006

I received the contract this afternoon and will sign it and send it back tomorrow morning. I also get to write and hand in my letter of resignation tomorrow.

Because the person whose role I’m taking has brought forward their leave date I get no handover. And because they want me straight away I have to pray my current company is ok with slightly less notice than usual.

No pressure Lucy, nnnooo pressure.

I’ll ignore the little stress kitten I have become, with even more stress induced mouth ulcers which are a complete bitch. And I’ll give myself props for not smoking, although the force is strong in the nicotine.

Hating your job is a new experience for me. And I don’t hate the work, and I love my manager and my work colleague’s are just awesome. I think it’s the people I support and their inane bloody requests. Working in IT support is…..character building?

I went to patch (i.e. activate a phone outlet) what I was told was a dead port after asking the user to test it. When I got down there I found out they hadn’t plugged the phone in properly. Jesus wept.

Plus right now I support and manage a voice network for 1500+ staff. At the new job I will be supporting 200 staff and getting paid almost double my salary.

It’s a welcome relief. Plus it’s a 6 month contract so I get to focus on short term goals for a while. Maybe afterwards go overseas for work for a year, move interstate. Who knows.

What I do know is one of the men I work with and his partner gave birth to their first child and he called in to announce it and I picked up the call and I have never heard such unabashed wonder and happiness. It was just awesome. And although the fb is terrible, and there has not been a sleepover in 3 or 4 weeks and we had an argument which ended with a ‘sod off’ which only made me giggle. But I’m still annoyed but the sod off is still amusing. And I’ve reverted to using all of my English and Irish relatives curse words so it’s all feck, and eedjit and prat and gobshite and these things make me happy. And e-mailing angry cute boys, and keeping the television turned off and eating canneloni. And training one of my work guys in Victoria to answer the phone like Chewbacca when I call which just makes me day.

Which means despite the ulcers, and the ‘jesus fuck I’m terrified’ new job feeling, and sad that I’ll be leaving a job i’ve worked at for nearly 5 years, and irritation that I’ve had no sleepover love in weeks things are kinda cool. And if they’re not then (as my father would say) tomorrow’s a better day.

And if it’s not, it and this lame post can sod off.


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